Yu Yu Hakusho Sitcom Style
by Hyperchick85
Summary: YYH has become a sitcom! Ch. 4 is FINALLY up! As if that didn't take long enough. Very Funny!
1. Another Boring Day

A/n: Hi. This is a fun little story that is co-written by me, Hyperchick85, and my sister Rose_Whip. The idea came to me one time while watching "Family Guy" on Adult Swim, so I thought about what if YYH were to have a sitcom style that is somewhat similar to "Family Guy". This story is rated PG-13 for swearing, some violence, innuendo, and sexual refrences, but nothing explicit. Oh, and flames will be accepted, I will use them in "Rooms of Insanity" to test hair flamibility.  
  
disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or any other product name that may be mentioned in this story. My sis and I just own the OC's.  
  
Ai is my character, Kohana is my sisters. Pairings: Yusuke/Keiko, Hiei/Kohana, Kuwabara/Yukina, Botan/Charles (OC)  
  
Yu Yu Hakusho Sitcom Style  
Ch.1 Just another boring day  
  
*actions*, 'thoughts'  
  
Our story begins in your average sub-urban house in some random city. The house has nice trim green grass and a pretty rose garden in the front. (gee who could be responsible for that?) The inside of the house is mostly clean and well-kept. Comming down the stairs is everybody's favorite sprit sword wielder, Kuwabara.  
  
Kuwabara: *Marching down the stairs, whistling the YYH theme song. He trips over his own feet and goes tumbling down.* WHAAAAAAAAAAAAA! OUCH!!!! @_@  
  
audience unseen and unknown to the cast but known to us: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Kuwabara: *Gasp* Who's there? Who's in my house laughing at me?  
  
Kurama: *Walking out of the kitchen* Kuwabara, what are you doing?  
  
Kuwabara: *Gets off the floor* Kurama, there are strange people in our house! They laughed at me when I fell down the stairs! *Snifs the air* Hey what's burning?  
  
Kurama: MY POPCORN!!!!! *Runs back into the kitchen and pulls a fried bag out of the microwave* Ouch!!!!! hot hot very hot!!!!!!!! *Puts the bag in the sink*  
  
Kohana: *Storming into the kitchen and starts coughing* What the hell! *cough* did you guys do?!  
  
Kuwabara: Kurama, *cough* burned popcorn again. *cough*  
  
audience: hee hee hee  
  
Kuwabara: Did you hear that? *cough* They were laughing at us again!  
  
Kohana: *cough* Nobody is laughing at us, dumbass  
  
Kurama: *cough, gag* Need air! *Bolts out of the kitchen coughing*  
  
Kohana: Right! *She and Kuwabara run out of the kitchen after Kurama*  
  
Yusuke & Ai: YAHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Yusuke and Ai go racing by in office chairs. Ai stops before hitting a wall, and Yusuke crashes right into it.  
  
Ai: I WIN!!!!!!  
  
Yusuke: *Rubbing his head* Damn that hurt. How come you win?  
  
Ai: *Spinning in the chair* Because I didn't hit the wall and you did. WHOOOO!!!!  
  
Yusuke: Ugh! What's that smell?  
  
Kohana: Kurama burned more popcorn.  
  
Yusuke: again?!  
  
Ai: *Leaning back in her chair* I just don't understand this Kurama. How can somebody as old and as smart as you be unable to do something as simple as microwave some popcorn? I mean, the exact instructions are right on the bag. Even I can do it! * She leans back too far and flips her chair over, crashing into a table, knocking the lamp off it and into her lap.* I caught the lamp! cool.  
  
Before Kurama has a chance to respond, Botan appears out of nowhere with a chearful "What's up everyone!" Kuwabara yelps and jumps into Kohana's arms. Ai accidentally tosses the lamp and it shatters on the floor.  
  
Ai: Oopsie  
  
Audience: hee hee hee  
  
Kuwabara: *Gasp* the laughter...  
  
Kohana: What the hell are you doing Kuwabara?! *She drops him on the floor*  
  
Kuwabara: Oww! Hey did you have to drop me like that you little meanie?!  
  
Kohana: *Sternly* Yes.*Glares at him coldly*  
  
Audience: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kuwabara: *Getting to his feet* There it is again!  
  
Yusuke: Uh... whatever... Hey Botan what's up?  
  
Botan: Koenma sent me to get you guys. He needs you for a very important mission.  
  
Yusuke: Awwww another one! Ok Botan what the hell does he need this time?  
  
Botan: *Shrugs* I dunno, he said it was very important though. *Looks around* Hey where's Hiei? He needs to come too.  
  
Kurama: He's still in Makai, He's been there for quite a while now. Mukuro probably has him working hard again.  
  
Kohana: *Mumbles* I hate that bitch. Ok let's go see what the brat wants us to do this time.  
  
Ai: YAY A NEW MISSION!! I just love this spirit detective thing. It's so cool. *She grabs her tantos from the cornor and leaves with everyone else.*  
  
(a/n: For those who don't know, a tanto is a dagger like sword or "half- sword". I've always been a fan of the fighting with to swords technique. I'm not sure if there is an acual name for the technique or anything, but for now I'll just call her swords tantos.)  
  
Botan: Wow you sure are enthusiastic about this job, Ai.  
  
They all travel to the Spirit World and into the palace. Botan leads them into Koenma's office where they find him in his adult form, sitting behind his desk looking stressed out. They all notice something is different, but can't figure out what.  
  
Kuwabara: 'Something is different about him but I can't sense it. What is going on here?'  
  
Yusuke: 'Ok something is different here, but what the hell could it be?'  
  
Kurama: 'He seems really stressed out today. What ever this mission is about, it must be really important. And what seems so different about him?'  
  
Kohana: 'I don't wanna be here, what is his problem now?'  
  
Ai: 'Ok somethig is really different, did he re-paint his office or something?'  
  
Botan: 'I wonder what could be wrong with Koenma? It almost seems like something about him is...missing'  
  
Koenma: *Sighs* Detectives, I have a very important case for you. Something very important to me has been stolen, my pacifier.  
  
Yusuke: *Gasp* Now I know what missing off of you pacifier breath! YOUR LOUSY PACIFIER!!!!  
  
Ai: He just said that genious.  
  
Yusuke and Ai glare at eachother  
  
Kohana: Whoa, whoa, whoa, somebody stole you pacifier?  
  
Koenma: Well, yes  
  
Yusuke: Why? Who the hell would want that stupid old thing?!  
  
Koenma: *Agitated* Moron! *Sits up and pounds a fist on his desk* That's where I keep all my energy stored. You know that!  
  
Yusuke: *Scratching his head* Really, well I forgot about that.  
  
Koenma: *Groans and sinks back into his chair* Honestly Yusuke, were you in the back of the line when they were passing out brains.  
  
Kohana: No, he was on vacation with Kuwabara and Ai. *Points at Kuwabara and Ai*  
  
Ai: *Offended* HMPH!!! I happen to like going on vacation with morons.  
  
Kuwabara: Hey! Are you calling me stupid?  
  
Kohana: Well duh, what else would I call you? *Rolls her eyes*  
  
Koenma: Wait a minute! Where's Hiei? I can't send you guys off without him! He and that Jagan eye of his will be needed for this!  
  
Kurama: He's still in Makai, probably at Mukuro's place.  
  
----- 20 minutes later-----  
  
Koenma is pacing back and forth across the room, Kohana and Kurama are building a replica of the Effile Tower out of paper clips. Ai, Kuwabara and Yusuke are playing an aggresive game of Go-Fish. Boton's reading a Cosmo magizine, and Ogre is listening to music, pilling loads of paper work onto Koenmas' desk.  
  
Koenma: Ohhh, where is Hiei, he's suposed to have been here by now!  
  
Ogre: Just calm down Koenma Sir, I'm sure he'll get here as soon as he can.  
  
Koenma: Well that's not soon enough!  
  
Finally Hiei struts on in, wearing one of his trade mark "Don't mess with me" scowls. Everyone in the room looks up at him, waiting for an explination of his absence.  
  
Koenma: *Glares at Hiei* You're late! Where have you been!?  
  
Hiei: *Glares back at him* Hn. Not my fault that I'm late.  
  
Koenma: Really, then who's fault is it?  
  
Hiei: Mukuros. I had to screw her before she let me leave.  
  
------------------------------------------------  
  
A little while earlier...  
  
Hiei: Would you hold still for just one second so I can get this going in right?  
  
Mukuro: Well excuse the hell out of me, but I am not in a very cofortable possition right now!  
  
Hiei: Hn, well it was your choice to do this here. Now let me finish up. I'm late.  
  
Mukuro: Oh, they can wait and this can't. Keep going.  
  
Hiei: *Grunts* Damn! How much tighter do you want this to get?  
  
Mukuro: Ugh, As tight as you can get it!  
  
Hiei: Fine!  
  
Mukuro: Ahhh! Hey ease up a bit, you're going to hard!  
  
Hiei: Deal with it, you said you want it tight.  
  
Mukuro: Well you don't have to be so crass about it!  
  
Hiei: *throws down the screw-driver and backs away* There I'm done. I'm leaving now.  
  
Mukuro: *Rising from an uncomfortable looking chair rubbing the side of her head that has the robotic eye* Oh, now it's too tight. I can't move my eye. Loosen it up a bit.  
  
Hiei: Get over it. I have to leave  
  
Mukuro: *Sighs* Fine you may go. (a/n: I don't know or think that Mukuro has screws or bolts or anything like that, but hey its funny right!)  
  
------------------------------------------------  
  
Everyone in the room gasps at Hiei, with wide eyes and sweat drops.  
  
Kohana: *Extremely pissed off* Yo-yo-you WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Hiei: You heard me. I had to screw Mukuro. She wouldn't let me leave until I did.  
  
Kurama: How could you Hiei!?  
  
Hiei: With a screw-driver, what else would I use?  
  
Yusuke: *Snicker, snicker* If that's what you want to call it.  
  
Kuwabara: *Laughing a bit* really.  
  
Kohana: *A little upset =*( I can't believe you Hiei. Why?  
  
Hiei: Hn, she had a few bolts that needed to be tightened.  
  
Kohana: YOU BASTARD!!! *Runs up and slaps his face, knocking him onto his ass*  
  
Hiei: *Stands up rubbing his cheek* What the hell did you do that for?!  
  
Kohana: Go get fucked! Oh that's right, you just did! *Turns her back towards him*  
  
Hiei: What?! What are you fools going on about?!  
  
Kurama: What do you mean? You just said you were screwing Mukuro!  
  
Hiei: I was! She needed some bolts tightened.  
  
Koenma: You can deal with your problems later! You guys need to get going on your case!  
  
Yusuke: Ok Koenma, What's our case this time?!  
  
Koenma: Get your asses out of here and recover my stolen pacifier!!!!  
  
Ai: *Gasp* Koenma just swore! *Everything is silent for a few seconds*  
  
Hiei: Somebody stole your pacifier?  
  
Koenma: *Very angred* YES!  
  
Kohana: Hold on a sec, if you don't have your pacifier, then how did you get into your adult form?  
  
Koenma: I-I-I was in my adult form when I lost it.  
  
Kohana: Oh, so now you lost it? Hmmmmmmmm?  
  
Ogre: He had it out of his mouth and was making faces in the mirror again  
  
Koenma: *Slightly embarassed* Just get out of my office and find my stolen pacifier NOW!!!!!!!  
  
Everyone rushes out of the room snickering and embarks on their mission to find Koenma's "stolen" Pacifier. What will happen next? Will Kurama ever learn to make popcorn? Will Kuwabara ever figure out who the strange laughing voices are? Will Yusuke ever not forget something? Probably not, but join us next time to find out!  
  
A/n: For those of you who are reading "Rooms of Insanity" I am still working on it. I just decided to completely re-write most of it. I was working on it during band camp and left it at my school. But due to the Massive power outage in the Northeast, (I'm in Michigan, which was affected) Band camp was cancled for thursday and Friday. That means I won't be able to get a hold of my notebook containing the story until school starts up. Otherwise I would have updated my story by now. So no worries, it will be updated hopefully soon. 


	2. The Great Pacifier Search

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed for chapter one. I'm glad people liked the "screwing" part. I honestly thought I might get flamed for that. Well, on to chapter two. Please read and review!!! This chapter is kinda long, but I think it's good! Disclaimer: We don't own YYH or it's characters.Nor do we own any product that may be mentioned in our story. We only own our OC's.  
  
Ai: I'm the better OC!!!  
  
Kohana: Like hell you are!!!!!!  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------  
  
Koenmas pacifier has been stolen. Now it is up to the spirit detectives to revocer the valuable spirit uh... treasure. How will they find one pacifier with three realms to search through before it is too late?  
  
Ch.2 The Great Pacifier Search  
  
Everyone is in Makai searching high and low for the pacifier. Hiei is using his Jagan to search for its energy, Kuwabara is looking under bushes, Botan is floating about on her oar searching for any sign of the pacifier.  
  
Yusuke: *grumbling* This is so stupid! How the hell does he expect us to find that stupid pacifier?! We don't even know where to begin looking!  
  
Kohana: Just shut the hell up and look!  
  
Hiei: Hn!  
  
Kohana: Oh what are you "hn" ing about you little Mukuro f*cker?!  
  
Audience: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  
  
Kuwabara: *Jumps out of the bushes* The laughing voices followed us!  
  
Ai: *Glaring at Kuwabara* Don't make me hurt you.  
  
Hiei: What are youu talking about Kohana?! I never did anything with Mukuro!  
  
Kohana: I hate you! Don't ever talk to me again!  
  
Hiei: Fine! if that's how you really want to end our relationship...  
  
Kohana: Hn!  
  
Hiei: Hn!  
  
Botan: Uh, how about finding that pacifier now.  
  
Kurama: Yes, the sooner we start, the sooner we will find it.  
  
Ai: *Jumps out of a tree* Well that logic makes sense, but how do we know which realm to look in?  
  
Yusuke: Yeah Botan! Arn't you supposed to know this stuff?  
  
Botan: Well how am I supposed to know! I know nothing more about this mission than you!  
  
Kuwabara: Why don't you guys just stop arguing and look for this stupid thing!  
  
Ai: Hey, for once Kuwabara said something smart.  
  
Audience: HAHAHA!!  
  
Kuwabara: Damn it! Where the hell is that laugh coming from?  
  
Ai: *sigh* Scratch that.  
  
Botan: Oh no! Looks like we have company coming!  
  
A gang of 6 rogue demon thieves come forth from the surrounding wilderness. They all have their weapons drawn and are ready to attack.  
  
Thief 1: What are you doin' on our turf?  
  
Thief 2: This is our roaming land! By invading it you've signed you death warrents!  
  
Yusuke: What the hell! We are a little too busy to play with you right now.  
  
Thief 3: We don't want to play, We want to Kill!  
  
Ai: I swear are all 3rd rate demons the same or what? *Pulls out her Tantos* (a/n: Ai is a human.)  
  
Kurama: Yeah, most of them. Rose whip!  
  
Kuwabara: Well, looks like it's time for a little one on one. Not like I couldn't kill them all of course. Spirit Sword!  
  
Yusuke: Oh come on Kuwabara sharing is nice, don't ya know! Besides I want some action as well. *Gets his spirit gun ready*  
  
Thief 1: One of us would be more than enough to take on all of you!  
  
Hiei: *Holding his Katana* I don't think so.  
  
Kohana: *Gets her boomerangs ready* You weaklings sure do talk big, but I doubt you could back it up.  
  
Thief 4: Ooooh! I get the boomerang bitch. She's good lookin'. Once she looses to me we can have some real fun!  
  
Kohana: YOU PERVERT!! *She throws her boomerangs and slices the demons head off.*  
  
Yusuke: You assholes are just slowing us down! Spirit Gun!  
  
Kuwabara: Really! I'm missing my favorite show! *He cuts a demons in half*  
  
Hiei and Kurama simply slaughter their targets without saying anything. Ai decides to do a little actual combat with a thief who also uses the two knife technique. The others watch her fight the demon who appears to be not much of a match.  
  
Kuwabara: You know, I've never actually seen her fight with those things.  
  
Botan: She's pretty good!  
  
Hiei: Hn, not bad for an annoying human.  
  
Kurama: Indeed  
  
Yusuke: Hey! Quit playing around Ai! We need to get going!  
  
Ai: Ok, Geez you people never let me have any fun! *She thrusts one of her tantos into the demons head and the other into its heart.* This was the first time I've ever come across a demon who uses the same technique as me, so, I took the oppertunity to fight against him. I kinda regret it though, he was so pitiful it almost gives the technique a bad reputation. *Trying to dislodge her tanto from the demons head* The damn thing won't come out!  
  
Ai continues to jerk on the knife until she finally yanks it out. She falls backwards into some mud and the head of the demon goes flying through the air. Botan catches the head.  
  
Botan: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *She tosses the head and leaps into Kurama's arms*  
  
Kurama: Uhhhh... *Blush blush* (a/n: Yes, I am a HUGE fan of BotanxKurama pairing, but unfortunately, that isn't a pairing in this story. Rose_Whip wouldn't let me!!)  
  
Audience: *Roaring with laughter* HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kuwabara: I swear I'm gonna get you! You mysterious laughing voice!  
  
Ai: Awwwwww look! Kurama's blushing.  
  
Kurama: Am not!  
  
Kohana: Yeah you did! HAHA!  
  
Botan: *Lets go of Kurama, blushing a little herself* Ummm well, let's get going.  
  
Kurama: Yes, good idea.  
  
The group continues their search through Makai. They come up on a small clearing in the woods. Suddenly a hugh gust of wind knocks them all off their feet. The gust is followed by a maniacal irish accented laugh. A tall demon with wild red hair that surrounds a small white horn on his forehead, and big blue eyes rushes up to them.  
  
Demon: *Talking with a fast paced, cheerful, irish accent* Well, well, well. Lookie at what we've got here! A bunch goes and gets themselves lost in the woods and wanders into my home! What a shame! Hey, aren't you Yusuke Urameshi?! *Rushes up and shakes a baffled Yusuke's hand* Nice to see ya lad!  
  
Yusuke: *Takes his hand back* Uhhh right...  
  
Demon: Don't ya know! You are quite famous here! Many of us demons lost a pretty penny bettin' against you in the tournaments. But eh, that's all in the past is it not. So, what brings you around here? On another mission are ye?!  
  
Yusuke: 'Who is this guy and how the hall does he know me?'  
  
Kuwabara: 'What is so familiar about this wierdo?'  
  
Kurama: 'I know I've seen this fighter before...'  
  
Hiei: 'What a fool'  
  
Ai: 'hehehehe. He's kinda cute ^_^'  
  
Yusuke: That's it! I know who you are! You're Jin that wind master guy aren't you.  
  
Demon: Ack no! I'm not Jin, I'm his twin brother Tonik! (a/n: Get it? Jin and Tonik? Gin and Tonic HAHA ok yeah)  
  
Kuwabara: You mean that freak has an identical twin?  
  
Tonik: Yup! We're two peas in a pod Jin and I are!  
  
Kurama: Obviously  
  
Jin has a twin, The pacifier is still missing. Hiei and Kohana broke up, and Kuwabara still hears the laughing voices. What can all of this possibly be leading to? I'm not telling. You'll just have to wait to find out!  
  
In the meantime, please review and tell me what you think so far. (If you're going to flame, be sensible about it) Any review is much appreciated. The more good reviews I get, the soner I update. Oh and I finally updated Rooms of Insanity! If you haven't checked it out yet, you should. I need some ideas quick, so if you're looking for a good humor story, check it out please! Thanks 


	3. Pacifier Found!

Well, I still haven't gotten many reviews for this story, but I am still going to post it anyway for the hell of it. I know the last chapter wasn't very sitcom'ish, but the rest will be, I think. By the way, this chapter is a long one, so you might wanna grab some popcorn or something. -HC85  
  
Disclaimer: We don't own YYH, just our OC's  
  
*actions* , 'thoughts'  
  
Ch. 3 Pacifier Found!  
  
The Spirit Detectives are out in Makai searching high and low for Koenma's missing pacifier. They have stumbled upon Tonik, the equally wild twin brother of Jin the Wind Master. What could this mean for Team Urameshi? Do you really wanna know? Hahahaha I thought so!  
  
Tonik: So, enough 'bout Jin and m'self, I'd like to know what your lot is up to, romping about in my home n' such?  
  
Kuwabara: *To Kurama* What did he just say?  
  
Yusuke: Uh right, we're really buisy searching for something.  
  
Tonik: Oh really? Be it another lost Spirit Treasure no doubt!  
  
Hiei: Yes, now shut up and go away!  
  
Tonik: Oh...well aren't you the cheerful one today. *Goes to hit hit Hiei (The friendly kind of hit) on the back, but instead nails him on the back of the head* Chill out and enjoy yourself, it's a lovely night!  
  
Audience: HAHAHAHA!  
  
Kuwabara: Why does that voice keep following us?!  
  
Hiei: *Reaches for his sword* Why you...  
  
Kohana: *Snicker snicker*  
  
Kurama: *Wispers* Hiei, not now. We're too buisy  
  
Yusuke: Well, we better get going on our mission now. See ya!  
  
Tonik: Leavin' so soon, wouldn't ya like to stay for a drink or somthin'?  
  
Kuwabara: By "a drink" do you mean alcohol?  
  
Tonik: *Rolls his eyes* No lad, plain s'mple water.... of course I mean whiskey n' such! It isn't jus' the Irish humans who love to party after all! *Whiskey In The Jar starts playing out of no-where. (A good Irish folk song)*  
  
Yusuke: 'Hmm free boose?' Well, now that you mention it, we could stay for just a little while...  
  
Tonik: Well now! That's the spirit!  
  
Kohana: Hn, we really don't have time for this you losers. Besides I don't drink.  
  
Ai: Yeah you do!  
  
Kohana: NO I DON'T!  
  
Ai: Oh what? You don't remember the last party you were at?  
  
--------------- A few months ago -------------  
  
The gang went to an unsupervised party at one of Yusuke and Kuwabara's friends house. Kohana is in the middle of the room dressed in a grass skirt, coconut bra, Bruger King crown, and platform shoes. Eminem's "8 Mile" song is playing.  
  
Kohana: Whooooo doggy!!! I love this song! LET'S ALL DISCO!! *She starts dancing the monkey*  
  
All of the guys there except for Hiei are hooting and cheering. They start yelling "Take it off." Kohana reaches for the back of her bra.  
  
Ai: Uh Hiei, you better go stop you girlfriend before something regretable happens.  
  
Hiei: Hn, what do you expect me to do?  
  
Ai: Uh, distract her. Get her to do something to take her mind off of becoming a stripper in front of a bunch of highschool perverts.  
  
Hiei: That's sick! I am not going to do that here!  
  
Ai: Whoa! TMI! I didn't need to know what's on your mind!  
  
The crowd starts cheering madly as Kohana's bra goes flying across the room.  
  
Hiei: *Staring intently* Hmmmmmm....  
  
Ai: *Sigh* Too late. This is one thing she won't wanna remember... How could anyone get this smashed after just a few Rum and Cokes?  
  
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Kohana: I-I totally forgot about that!  
  
Tonik: So, what about it? Would ya like to stay for a bit?  
  
Kohana: NO, no! W-we don't have time for any of this nonsense! Ha ha! *Pushes everyone away* Mabey some other time we can all get together and uh... party! *mumbles* yeah right, I'll never do that again. We'll se you later Tunic!  
  
Tonik: It's Tonik. Alrighty then, I'll se y'all later! Bye  
  
And so our group continues their trip through Makai. They are tired, frustrated, hungry, and ready to hurt eachother.  
  
Yusuke: *Singing* Musha ring dum a doo dum a da Whack foe my daddy-o Whack foe my daddy-o, there's whiskey in the jar.  
  
Botan: I don't know how much more of this torutre I can take.  
  
Yusuke: *Still singing* I counted all my money, and it made a pretty penny I put it in my pocket and I gave it to my Jenny  
  
Hiei: Yusuke, shut up before I rip your lungs out.  
  
Yusuke: *You guessed it, still singing* She signed and she swore that she never would decieve me, but the devil take some women 'cause they never can be easy  
  
Kurama: *Grabs Yusuke by the shirt collar* Shut up! Damn you! Shut up before I kill you!  
  
Everyone: *Blink blink*  
  
Kurama: *Lets go of Yusuke*Ahem, shall we continue?  
  
Audience: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Kuwabara: *Makes a fist* I'm gonna get you, you whimpy laughing voices!  
  
Ai: I new he'd snap like that some day.  
  
Kohana: *Hugs Kurama* Oh, I'm so proud of you! Just when I though that you've reformed too much!  
  
Hiei: *Scoffs* It's not that big of a deal...  
  
Kuwabara: *Stops looking for the voices* What Hiei? Are you jelous?  
  
Kohana: Get over it Hiei. dishonest creep.  
  
Hiei: I am not a dishonest creep! And I am over you, you weren't anythink that special anyway.  
  
Kohana: Oh, So even I'm not good enough for a born reject like you?!  
  
Hiei: Hn!  
  
Kohana: Just don't talk to me ever again!  
  
Botan: *Nervous* Ok! Let's not get hasty, we've got a pacifier to find.  
  
Yusuke: Oh, shut up Botan! It's not like you're helping us any!  
  
Botan: I beg your pardon! All you've been doing the entire time is complaining and singing us all to death!  
  
Ai: Let's just not talk to eachother and get the damn mission finished.  
  
Kurama: Yes, that sound like a good idea...  
  
Yusuke: Yeah, of course you'd agree! You started it!  
  
Kurama: Me? How did I start this?!  
  
Yusuke: You attacked me!  
  
Kurama: Because you wouldn't stop singing!  
  
Kuwabara: Guys! Somebody's coming!  
  
Yet another gang of rogue demons spring from the bushes. With their weapons drawn, they charge the detectives.  
  
Kohana: *Conjures her Spirit Boomerangs* I'll take care of them  
  
She moves in to make her attack as the demons grow near. Just as she is about to strike, there is a gust of wind and small flashes of light as the demons are slashed into pieces. Kohana stops in her tracks, a look of hatred crosses her face. Arisa is standing amongst the fallen bodies, sword drawn and coverd in blood, and wearing her trademark "I hate everybody" scowl.  
  
Kohana: What the hell! I was going to kill them!  
  
Arisa: *Glares at Kohana* Shove it boomerang bitch. You're too slow and they were in my way.  
  
Kohana: What! Too slow! I'm as fast as you are! You are so dead!  
  
Arisa: Whatever. Let me at least deliver my message from Koenma before you humor me with your futile attemps to hit me with those hunks of Spirit cardboard you call a weapon!  
  
Kohana: Spirit cardboard! I'll show you Spirit cardboard, Bitch!  
  
Yusuke: Just chill out! This could actually be important! Ok Arisa, what's pacifier breath's message.  
  
Arisa: *Whipes off her blade* He said he wants you back at the castle.  
  
Yusuke: Yeah, and?  
  
Arisa: *Resheaths he sword* That's all he said. *She leaves as fast as she came*  
  
Kuwabara: Wow, she's improved on her conversation skills. She's almost as nice as Hiei.  
  
Hiei: Shut up Kuwabara.  
  
Yusuke: That's stupid, why did he send her to find us, just to say that he wants us back? Why didn't he just send Botan?  
  
Botan: Probably because I'm right here already!  
  
Kurama: Let's just get back to Spirit World and see what he wants.  
  
The Spirit Detectives travel back to Koenma's castle and troop into his office. He is still sitting behind his desk in teenage form looking rather distraught. Mile high stacks of paper work cover his desk and the surrounding floor space.  
  
Yusuke: Ok Koenma, what the hell do you want now?!  
  
Koenma: Oh good, you're back. There is evidence that my pacifier never left the Spirit World. There have been no illegal Spirit World entries for over 24 hours. So, if my pacifier is outside of Spirit World, it must have been one crafty thief.  
  
Kuwabara: What's you're point?  
  
Koenma: I want you to scower Spirit World until it is found....  
  
Ogre: *Comes running in with the pacifier in hand* Koenma sir! Koenma sir! We found it!  
  
Koenma: My pacifier! *Takes it from Ogre and puts it in his mouth*  
  
Ogre: I wouldn't do that just yet Koenma sir.  
  
Koenma: Why not?  
  
------------ A few hours ago---------------  
  
Koenma is walking down a hallway in his teenage form. He goes past a mirror, stops quickly and runs back to it. After checking to see that nobody is around he snickers and pulls out his pacifier and sets it on a table benieth the mirror and starts making faces infront of the mirror.  
  
Ogre: Koenma sir! There you are! What are you doing?  
  
Koenma: *Stops and turns around quickly, accidentally knocking his pacifier off the table* N-nothing. I was just making sure my hair wasn't all messy. Now what do you want.  
  
Another Ogre goes running by in a hurry, kicking the fallen pacifier down the hallway.  
  
Ogre: You have tons of paper work in your office that needs stamping.  
  
Koenma: *Sigh* Ok, *Starts to leave, then stops and looks at the table and notices his pacifier is missing* Ogre! What did you do with my pacifier!  
  
Ogre: Nothing Koenma Sir, why?  
  
The pacifier conitnues bouncing down the hallway, occasionally getting kicked by an Ogre of Fairy Girl as they run by. As an Ogre comes out of the Ogre's mens room, the pacifier rolls through the door before it closes  
  
Koenam: Because it's missing that's why!  
  
Ogre: Maybe it fell of the table while you were making faces in the mirror.  
  
Koenma: *Looking under the table* I was not making faces in the mirror! My pacifier was stolen! Alert security! Tell Botan to get Yusuke and the others here NOW!  
  
-----------------------------------------------  
  
Ogre: Because it was found behind a tiolet in the Ogre's mens room!  
  
Koenma: *Turns green in the face and spits out his pacifier* Aaahhhh! Excuse me!! *He bolts out of the office*  
  
Audience: HEHEHEHEHE!  
  
Kuwabara: Why am I the only one who ever hears these voices!  
  
Hiei: Because, they want to kill you.  
  
Kuwabara: Huh, they do?  
  
Yusuke: Stupid! All that and the damn thing was in a stupid bathroom the whole time!  
  
Kurama: This whole mission was absurd. Let's just go home. I'm tired and I want to forget this whole mission ever happened.  
  
Ai: Me too  
  
Kohana: I just wanna ge the hell out of here before I murder that brat!  
  
After a long day, the Detectives return home for some rest and reconsiliation. But what sort of adventures await them at their retreat that they call "home", in a sitcom where everything goes wrong, and when the authors of the sitcom are socially declaired insane? You'll have to wait to find out in the next chapter of Yu Yu Hakusho Sitcom Style. 


	4. Finally Home!

Thanks to everyone who has reviewed our story. We appreciate it. If you are reading this and haven't reviewed yet, please do! Reviews are important; they're our only lifeline! Just kidding. -HC85

Disclaimer: We don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, just our OC's. Anna the Crazed Kurama Fan Girl is based off of a real person. We borrowed her, but she will be safely returned home when we're done. This is another long one. We advise that you get a snack!!

actions, 'thoughts'

Yu Yu Hakusho Sitcom Style

Chapter 4

Finally home again!

Our detectives are returning home from a hard day's work. They are pretty grumpy after the most ludicrous mission of their short lives. (Well, Kurama's life hasn't been very short.)

Ai: Finally home! I am so damn tired.

As our group approaches the door, a rustling noise is heard from the bushes.

Yusuke: Did you all hear something?

Kuwabara: Yeah, and I'll bet it's those same laughing voices!

Audience: hehehehehehe

Kuwabara: Hey! You better stop messing with us before I hurt you.

Ai: More like we're going to beat you if you don't shut up!

All of a sudden, Anna, the Crazed Kurama Fan Girl jumps out of the bushes and throws herself at Kurama

Anna: Finally! Flower Man, you have returned to me! I've been hiding in the bush for hour's awaiting you arrival! Can I touch your hair? Please?!

Kurama: 'Why me? Why can't she be a Hiei fan or something?' Uh, sorry but I'm uh really tired and I'm going to bed now and...

Anna: Gasp Bed... did you say BED? Can I come with you?!?!?!?! Please Flower Man?!?!?!

Kurama: No!!! er... ummm no, I don't think that would be a good idea...

Anna: Seductive smile Oh, but I think it would be a good idea...

Everybody else just sighs and walks into the house.

Anna: Please! What do you say?

Kuama: Walks in and closes the door Goodnight.

Anna: Shouts through the door Goodnight my Flower Man! I'll see you later!

Ai: Trouble with you stalker again, Kurama?

Kurama: Nods and walks to the couch and sits down Yes, but this time she talked to me again. Usually she would just say Mocks Anna "Flower man!" then she would stare and me and... moan.

Kohana: walks out of the kitchen with BBQ potato chips Why don't you just make her forget about you or something?

Kurama: It wouldn't work. All she'd have to do is go home and watch more Yu Yu Hakusho, and then she'd fall in love with me all over again.

Audience: HAHAHA!

Kuwabara: Jumps up off the couch THAT'S IT! I'M GONNA BEAT YOU SO BAD LAUGHING VOICE THAT JO MAMA WON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE YOU!

The front door opens and a guy that looks like Danny from Grease (the movie) walks in.

Man: Hey Hey Hey! Thumbs up I'm Joe Mama, who called for me? Well, that's not important because now you're under my curse. Struts across the room, takes Kohana's chips, struts back to the door and leaves

Kohana: Gasp Huh? He took my chips! Looks at her empty hands, then to the door in shock

Kurama: I swear I locked that door! Investigates the door It's still locked...

Yusuke: He looked nothing like my mama!

Kuwabara: Sheepishly He looked a little like my mama...

Ai: Then I NEVER wanna meet Joe Mama...

Joe Mama: Crawls through a closed window Hey Hey Hey! Thumbs up, then he walks past Kurama and out the front door. Everyone stares in shock

Hiei: Comes down the stairs and notices the shocked looks Hn, what's going on down here?

Kohana: HN! Crosses her arms and turns away from Hiei

Ai: Oh nothing out of the ordinary... strange men breaking and entering, Kuwabara admits that his mom looks like a man, aliens abduct Yusuke's brain...

GIR from Invader Zim goes running out with Yusuke's brain in a mason jar.

Yusuke: Groan Not again! Hey you! Give that back! Chases after GIR.

Kurama: How can he survive without a brain?

Kohana: I don't even wanna know.

Hiei: Not like he ever used it in the first place.

Yusuke: Walks in Ok, I got it back.

Ai: Right then, I'm going to bed now, I have to work tomorrow. Leaves

Kurama: Me too. Leaves

Yusuke: Yeah, I have to go to school.

Kuwabara: Same here. They leave

Hiei and Kohana simply follow everybody up to their rooms. Kurama walks into his and Hiei's room and flops down on his bed. Hiei walks in after him, goes to the window, and hops out of it and onto "his" tree branch to sleep.

Hiei: Pokes his head in the window Kurama, come here and see this. Snicker snicker

Kurama: Really tired What now?

He looks out and sees Anna walking towards his window dressed up as Juliet (How ever Juliet looks in your mind).

Anna: Flower Man, Flower Man, Where fore art thou Flower Man? Come forth to me and let me touch thy hair, and I shall be forever yours...

Kurama groans and slams the window shut. He flops back down in his bed, wishing he had a tranquilizer or something, not even bothering to change into any pajama's.

-Meanwhile in Kohana and Ai's room...

Kohana: Sitting up in bed I can't believe that little jerk! He promised that he would never cheat on me! I hate him!

Ai: Walks in the room in a bathrobe, fuzzy blue slippers, and combing her hair Are you going to bitch like this all night? I have work early tomorrow and I would really like to get some sleep tonight.

Kohana: Oh shut the hell up! Continues complaining out loud to herself

Ai: Whatever... Gets in bed and turns on some light music

Kohana: Turn the damn radio off! I don't wanna hear it all night!

Ai: And I don't wanna listen to you all night! Once you shut up, I'll turn it off!

Kohana: HN! Lays down I hate you... I hate everybody!

Ai: Sighs and turns off the radio Tell me something I don't know. Besides, maybe you've miss judged Hiei. I don't think he would ever cheat on you, especially not with Mukuro, of all people... er ummm... demons. He doesn't act like he's done anything. In fact, whenever you bring the subject up, it seems like he doesn't even know what you're talking about. Give him a chance to explain himself.

Kohana: He's just being a jerk. If he would rather have her... Then that's fine with me!

Ai: Do _you_ honestly think he would ever do anything with Mukuro?

Kohana:....

Ai: Exactly what I thought...

Kohana: HEY! I didn't say that he wouldn't... I ... Uh ...

Ai: Just give him a chance to explain.

Kohana: Shut up! I'll do what I want! Opens the window and hops out onto a tree branch and continues complaining to herself

Ai: What ever ... good night. falls asleep

-Yusuke and Kuwabara's room...

Yusuke is rummaging like crazy through a messy floor covered in papers, candy wrappers, magazines, pop cans, chip bags, and clothes.

Yusuke: Damn it! I can't find my homework. Stands up and scratches his head Did I even do my homework...?

Kuwabara is sitting on his bed on his side of the room, which isn't very messy at all.

Kuwabara: You never do your homework Urameshi. I don't even know how you managed to not fail these past few years.

Yusuke: Laughs That's an easy one, the teachers want me out of there so bad, they're afraid to fail me!

Kuwabara: Well... If that works for you, then fine. I like the feeling that I have accomplished something in my life.

Yusuke: Yeah, I guess you're good at something after all! Starts laughing

Kuwabara: Hey! I never said that I was good at school! I mean... Damn it! What I am saying is that at least I will amount to something!

Yusuke: Yeah whatever... Hey I found it! And I didn't even do any of it. Hmmmm... looks easy, so maybe I can work on it now... Studies paper for a few seconds Oh damn... This is from two weeks ago... Crumples up paper and throws it aside Nah... just forget it. I'll copy Keiko's before school or something.

Kuwabara: You know, if it wasn't for Keiko, you'd still probably be in the first grade.

Yusuke: Gets into bed Shut up! I wish you people would stop ragging on me all the time. I'm going to sleep now.

-Outside

Hiei is sitting outside and is quite irritated. He is trying to get some sleep, but with Anna's useless attempts at poetry, and Kohana's persistent complaining, it is proving to be a difficult task for our tired fire demon.

Anna: Standing outside Kurama's window Love is like a red rose that... looks pretty, like your red hair... and uhhh... I love the color red which means that

Kohana: I hate that stupid little pip squeak. I'm gonna rip off his

Anna: Blossoms that are big and beautiful. And after I pick thy blossoms I will

Kohana: Shove them down his throat and then I'll take him by the

Anna: Hand and lead you to a magical place where I'll

Kohana: Pull out his hair strand by strand... (What a loving girlfriend )

Hiei: Grrrrrr!! I can't take this anymore!! Gets up and heads over to Kohana

Kohana: Then... After I do that I'll...

Hiei: Jumps in front of Kohana Hey!

Alarmed, Kohana screams and slaps Hiei in the face, not even realizing it was him. He falls out of the tree and lands with a loud thud in the grass, inches away from Anna, who is still reciting her poetry.

Kohana: Oh shit! That was Hiei. Looks down, biting her nails nervously Ohhhh.... He's... fine. Geez, not like.... I'd care... After a second, she climbs back through her window and into bed, where she pulls her blankets over her head and pretends to be asleep

Anna: Starts throwing rotting apples from a neighbors tree at Kurama's window Flower Man! You aren's even listening to me! Open your window and hear my vows of eternal love!

Kurama opens his window to yell at Anna to stop and go away, and instead he gets hit in the eye with an apple, which splatters all over his face.

Anna: gasp Flower Man! Are you ok?!?!

Kurama: Go running into the bathroom Gross! I got rotten apple in my mouth! I'm going to be sick!

Hiei:...... Oh damn..... Sits up with a red handprint on his cheek, and a sore back

Anna: Oh Flower Man!! Please come back and let me kiss your boo boo! I'm sorry! Do you forgive me? Please?!?!

Hiei manages to stand up and gives Anna a death glare

Anna: Oh Hiei! You're out here! I need to apologize to Kurama. Could you take me inside? Hiei?? What are you planning to do with that rope?!?!

A few moments later, Anna is hog-tied and sitting in a far corner of the yard with a gag over her mouth, and Hiei is resting in his tree. Kurama has finished cleaning the apple off of himself, and is sitting in bed, healing his black eye. It's a rough night for our spirit detectives, but they somehow manage to get some rest. What adventures await them tomorrow? You'll have to wait for Chapter five to find out. Until next time. See you later. And please don't forget to hit that lil' review button and tell us what you think. Thank you! Have a good day!


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